Your Horoscope Today

Aquarius: Contemplate your future when your tongue freezes to the back of a speeding bus.

Pisces: Try to avoid any Virgos or Leos with the ebola virus.

Aries: The look on your face will be priceless when you find that 40lb watermelon in your colon.

Taurus: You will never find true happiness. Wotcha going to do? Cry about it?

Gemini: Your love life will run into trouble when your fiance hurls a javelin through your chest.

Cancer: The position of Jupiter says that you should spend the week faced down in the mud.

Leo: Now is not a good time to photocopy your butt and staple it to you bosses face.

Virgo: All Virgos are extremely friendly and intelligent, except for you. Expect a big surprise today when you wind up with your head impaled on a stick.

Libra: Laughter is the very best medicine. Remember that when your appendix bursts this week.

Scorpio: get ready for an unexpected trip when you fall screaming from an open window.

Sagetarius: Take down those naked pictures of Ernest Bergman in your office.

Capricorn: If I were you I'd lock my doors and windows and never leave my house again.

Ah yes, you have to love Weird Al!

Woah, power surge. Just cut off my computer.

Well I finally worked it out with the travel agent and it appears that I am finally going to Newfoundland! Yahoo.
Flying from Dublin to London and then to St. John's in NF, staying a few days and then it's off to Toronto, Vancouver and finally to Victoria.
Sounds like fun - eh?

Well I sent an email to Garry who is the 'Spirit of Race Rocks', Race Rocks being an island in the Pacific Ocean. I asked him if the sealions are real and what they feed them and all that. he responded telling me they were all real. Funny funny funny. Anyway, I hope he doesn't take it seriously. I asked if we could take a group out and I gave some ridiculous circumstances such as having a very large group of people who know nothing about the place but are willing to buy sealion food. He responded saying that it was possible for a donation to the race rocks charity. Uh Oh! I will either have to respond with some unreasonable requests or else let him in on the gag.


Went to the dentist this morning, causing me to be late for work. It appears that all is well. £40!!! Extortion!
Anyway life goes on.
Finally got some music into my office. Brought in some mp3 files on cd. Listening to Moxy Früvous right now, 'Fell in love'. Great song. Well I'm off to do my days work, earn some money!

For a good time, go to racerocks.com.
If you have a fast enough connection you can even view live streaming video. Yahoo! What I've always wanted. 24 hour sealions.

I'm going to get my hair cut today. Not that big a deal. Don't know why I mentioned it actually.

I brought my laptop in to work. It is only a small one, five years old, but it suits me for everything that I need right now. I want to connect it to the office network and transfer all the files that are vital to my academic future . I then want to burn them onto CD so that I can format my Hard Disk and put Windows 95 on the system instead of 98 becuase I have processor issues. Anyway, cycled in with this thing on my back. Wouldn't you know it, the battery was dead.

If I ruled the world, I would build a roof over Ireland. Maybe not a roof, but certainly a tent or a tarp or something.
There is something very unappealing about getting soaked every time that you crawl from under your hiding place.

Guess what, it's raining again. I can hear the drops bash of the office roof. Gee, I'm so glad I cycle to work!

Tell me,
why does it always rain in Ireland?

The air conditioning in this office is messed up. A guy came in to fix it the other day. He put it on a certain setting. Said that it would be fine at that. Fair enough! I came in to work the next morning to find that the thing was leaking again and that there was a large patch of damp plaster on the wall. I dried it up as much as I could. The weekend went by and I came in this morning and the place smells like eggs because of it.
Now anyone who walks into my office thinks that I have been farting all morning.
THIS IS NOT THE CASE!

I would terminate all those stupid people who email me at work with tech problems that are caused by an inability to tell the mouse buttons apart.
"Oh, the left mouse button!"
Watch out, your days are numbered